39 Minutes or Less: The Frequency of Porn Production in the US

I recently read that in the United States, a new pornographic film is created every 39 minutes. When you think about all that goes into the production of any kind of content, the number of different people/studios that must be creating pornography at any given moment to get such infrequent gaps in time between creation is absolutely mind-boggling. 39 minutes seems like a fair chunk of time until it’s all you have to get things done. To put it in perspective, here are 5 things you can do in 39 minutes or less, and 5 things you cannot.

 

You can…

  1. Take a nap. Science says the perfect nap is between 10 and 20 minutes. When you add that to the average sleep latency time (the time it takes to fall asleep), which is 15-20 minutes, most people will fall within the 39-minute range.
  2. Call your mom. I guess it depends on your mom, but as a nod to mine, who likes short, frequent calls, I had to include it.
  3. Work out. Burn off some calories! The Internet has a lot of (differing) opinions about the ideal length of a workout, but my grandmother, mother, and doctor have always told me to get in at least 30 minutes of weight-bearing (like walking) exercise a day.
  4. Make some eggs. Or ramen noodles, mac and cheese, grilled cheese, etc. Pretty much any kid-friendly food can be made in 39 minutes or less.
  5. Small cleaning tasks. I know, I know. Ugh. As unfun as cleaning is, it’s a fact of life is that it takes a relatively small amount of time to unload the dishwasher, fold clothes, do the dishes, etc; that is, if you do it regularly.

 

 

You cannot…

  1. Watch a movie. If you only have 39 minutes this pastime is out.
  2. Go out to dinner. You might be able to squeeze in a quick trip to your local McDonald’s, depending on the time of day, but no sit-down restaurants with only 39 minutes!
  3. Play a board game. Especially not Monopoly.
  4. Get a manicure. Or a pedicure. Or any kind of self-indulgent treatments. I can’t even get my hair cut for under 39 minutes.
  5. Take a class. Sorry, no time for self-improvement in 39 minutes.

 

For me, 39 minutes is the amount of time I spend deciding what to do next. It’s sitting in the car waiting for something to open because I left the house too early. It’s the amount of time I get to myself a day if I’m lucky. It is not, however, long enough to make a movie. It’s probably not even long enough to make a short video if it needs any kind of planning or editing. New movies come out weekly in the US, but new porn movies come out every 39 minutes. The fact that it only takes 39 minutes for a new pornographic film to be created in the US means that they are being made by a whole lot of people across the country, seemingly constantly. It seems to me like a lot of people would be a lot happier if instead of inundating the Internet with more porn than can ever be watched in a lifetime, they reference the list of other things they can do with 39 minutes. Personally, I recommend number 1.

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